Monday, October 31, 2011

023. Sin


Title: Dark Shadows
Genre: Mystery, Romance
Characters: Mystery Man, Beautiful Model
Prompt: 023. Sin
Word Count: 618
Rating: PG-13
Type: Series: 25 of 33
Summary: Another view inside a disturbed mind.
Warnings: Alcohol/cigarette use, sexual references


A noisy SUV passed him on the street, music blaring, probably a group of teenagers out raising hell. Not many other kinds of people were out at such a late hour, women looking to offer a “good time”, bums just waking to see what kind of trouble they could get into next. It was the perfect time of night for him to prepare. He stopped to go into a seedy bar, one that was chock full of the many types of people one would expect to find.
He looked around, amused at the sad mix of patrons, to him they all lacked vision and a purpose. Wasting their time and youth on empty pleasures like alcohol and sex, constantly going nowhere. He sat down at the bar next to a dirty man who was drowning himself in Jack Daniels, surrounded by a cloud of smoke.
Barely able to hide a grin at the pitiful display, he ordered a beer and lit up a cigarette himself. Glancing at the pathetic man beside him, he sipped the beer slowly and took a long drag on the cigarette, just enough to calm his nerves for the night ahead but that was all he would allow, he never wanted anything to get in the way of his pleasures, he had to stay alert and sharp or he knew he would fail.

He pushed the beer to the man next to him, “Here, have one on me,” he said, getting up, putting out his cigarette in an ashtray.

“Thanks, you’re a real life saver!” The man exclaimed, overjoyed at the abundance of liquor before him.

He shook his head and turned to leave, the television above the bar catching his attention. He smiled as he listened, the news anchor was appalled by such gruesome acts that were plaguing their fair city. She called it a sin. He shrugged and continued on his way out, observing the disgusting clientele that filled the tiny bar.

A sin, huh? What about prostitution? Men and women that are common whores who justify having random sex with a stranger by “having a good time”. And let’s not leave out the worst of them all, vanity.
He walked outside, ignoring a scantily dressed woman playing pool who seemed more than interested in showing him her ability to have a good time. Disgusted, he walked on, his recent train of thought fueling his anger to continue what he had to do. He had to punish them, make an example of their bad choices and poor scruples.
He headed north to the place they liked to party, most of them were such sluts it was nothing to entice them to take him home, he knew another one would be there tonight, they always were. The “beautiful” people, supermodels of high fashion. Empty, self-centered, greedy bitches is what he saw, murdering them wasn’t a sin, to him it was plain and simple justice.

The more he succeeded, the more excited he became, he was winning, always two steps ahead. Soon he would be able to tell her everything, show her what he had done for her, she would finally see and then they could be together forever and she wouldn’t care about the fashion world anymore. He would make sure of that, she had to understand it was wrong, disgusting.
He stopped in his tracks as he saw her, the gorgeous one from the new swimsuit calendar. Miss July. Short brown hair, a tiny waist and ample breasts. He instantly got an erection just watching her walk inside, she was so beautiful and the thought of what he was going to do to her tonight made his pulse pound in his ears.


4 comments:

Jean-Marie said...

You know those movies where you can tell after the first 15 min : 'The Butler did it'?

I've been having that...

...until this chapter arrived. Now another possible murderer came to mind and I don't like the idea, 'cause he's my favorite.

Now instead of saying : 'The Butler did it'
I'm getting : 'The Boyfriend did it' and my least favorite 'The Best-friend did it' (which sucks) (all B's)

Great ride Em, I must say!

...Still, I have this ominous feeling this story will not have the happy ending everyone's going for... I feel a major twist at 12 o' clock...

Emily said...

Jean Marie, uh oh that's not good! LOL! Definitely want it to be a surprise but I'll confess I'm still working out kinks with mysteries, call it Mystery 101! And of course I can't comment on your theories which is soooo hard! :D

Thank you so much for reading and leaving a comment! This kind of feedback is so important to me, you have NO idea how much I appreciate it!

Gayl said...

I always look forward to your updates because they really make me think. I've been going through a similar scenario as Jean-Marie in trying to figure out who the bad guy is. I've changed my mind constantly which is good! You really do know how to draw out a mystery.

I loved the glimpse inside the killer's head. He reveals his motives but still keeps his identity masked. Honestly there are so many possibilities as to who the killer is I am almost afraid to guess.

Great job Em!

Emily said...

Gayl, thank you! Oh my gosh I wish I was as confident in me as you! I always second guess with a mystery, the biggest thing is the surprise, which can be so hard to do.

Thank you again for reading and commenting, I always appreciate it!